Are You a Row Boat or a Cruise Ship?

Want to have some fun? Try crossing the Atlantic Ocean in a small row boat.

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You are going to bob wildly with each wave, always on the verge of flipping over.

On the other hand, you could make the journey on a cruise ship. You will barely notice the waves. They will not disturb the ship’s balance significantly as it glides majestically over the waves, staying on an even keel.

Go forward, not up and down

When you enter the ocean, you can expect waves. Some of them will be huge. It would be naïve to expect smooth sailing all the time.

Life is like that, too. You can expect periodic setbacks and disappointments.

The rowboat struggles to stay afloat. It just bobs up and down in an ocean, not making much forward progress.

And the cruise ship? Steady as she goes.

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As you negotiate the rough waters of life, would you like to be the cruise ship or the row boat?

Emotions

You can blow up when things don’t go your way. You can scream if your boss chooses your rival to head a project instead of you. That will not take you very far.

No one is against honest emotion. You feel sad from time to time. You are happy on other occasions. That is part of being human.

Love and hatred are also common feelings.

Control

The issue is one of control. Are you going to keep your emotions under control, or are you going to let them control you?

Uncontrolled happiness and excitement can flow over into mania. Extreme sadness can merge into depression.

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If you get over-excited at the smallest success, you tend not to prepare yourself for further challenges. And further challenges always lie ahead.

Similarly, if you are down in the dumps with each disappointment, you spend precious energy feeling sorry for yourself, rather than analyzing reasons for your failure and actively working to correct them.

Yoga is even-mindedness

If you don’t control your emotions, you will lurch from one extreme to the other. And what is the problem with that?

It detracts from performance

There is an important message in the Gita, an ancient Indian epic of philosophy and religion:

Yogasthah kuru karmani sangam tyaktava Dhananjaya

sidhayo asidhayo samo bhutva samatvam yoga ucchyate (Gita 2:48)

Lord Krishna, a Hindu god, is advising his disciple Arjuna in this verse to perform all his actions while remaining steadfast in yoga, and avoiding undue attachment to external objects. He further says that we should remain even-minded in success and failure. He declares that even-mindedness is truly yoga.

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Success and failure are inevitable

Nobody succeeds all the time.

Theodore Geisel submitted his first book to publishers, and got rejected: 26 times. On the 27th attempt, he was accepted. This led to his second book: “The Cat in the Hat.” And the world came to know Dr Seuss.

Nobody fails all the time.

During a particularly dark period, it may appear that a black cloud is following you around. But if you hang in there, quite often the tide does turn, and success can be yours again.

Composure

Calmness, even-mindedness, equanimity: No matter what you call it, you better strive for it.

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The Latin term aequanimitās is derived from aequus (even; calm; fair), animus (mind; soul) and itās. From this comes the French équanimité and the English “equanimity.”

Not getting too bent out of shape by events” might be another way of putting it.

Na prahrishayeta priyam prapyam na udvijeta prayama cha apriyama

Sthirbuddhih asammudhoh brahmavid brahmani sthitah (Gita 5:20)

One with God & the world

In the above verse, Lord Krishna is describing to Arjuna the attributes of the person who has obtained an understanding of God, and who is firmly established in that state of oneness with God.

Such a person does not get thrilled to bits when he obtains something pleasing to him, and does not get all worked up if some misfortune befalls him. His mind and intellect are calm and steady. He is not readily confused by the happenings of this world. He understands the presence of God.

He is one with God.

He is also one with the universe, and is well equipped to function well in the world.

The wise muni

Dukheshu anudvignamanah sukheshu vigatasprihah

veet raga bhaya krodhah sthitadhih munih ucchyate (Gita 2:56)

This is a description of the “Muni,” or a learned and wise person, whose intellect and wisdom are steady and well established in sound principles. Such a person does not let his mind be perturbed by sad or unpleasant events. Likewise, he does not allow himself to crave material pleasures. He has risen above the bonds of attachment, fear and anger.

We have already discussed the roller coaster ride which your emotions can take you on. But pleasure and happiness? Should we not pursue them?

Is happiness a goal?

Not really. It is a state of mind, not just a pursuit. The more you pursue happiness, the more you are tempted to let external events and material pleasures determine your fate. And those are not always under your control.

And they are not permanent.

It is far better to practice a steadiness of thought and of intellect, to better control your actions and your reactions to events. These are the things which are actually under your control.

So what to do?

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Don’t wait for happiness and satisfaction. Grab them now. The yoga of even-mindedness and calmness is one way.

Mindful meditation and deep breathing will also help.

More about those later.

Want to read more?

The above issues, and more, are discussed in detail in my eBook “How to Lead a Satisfying Life: 11 Universal Lessons From the Gita, which is available here.